Act II, Scene III - Life's a Beach

I have to say that Airlie Beach is really something else. I mean, how can you complain about a place that's warm enough to tan in during what is literally the middle of winter? And, oh, yes, I got tan. :)

Andrej and I spent the 5th and the 6th at the Seaview Hostel with other people from La Trobe, and I do have to say that it was a very good idea. 16 people crammed into what clearly used to be 2-bedroom apartment is not exactly the best of living conditions, but when it's amongst friends, it's really not so bad. That and $12/day for accommodation is hard to refuse, especially since we were staying in a place that was $43/day and wasn't even all that great. The Seaview was much closer to the center of town, to the beaches, to the lagoon, and much closer to all of our memorable experiences. Not the least of which is the site of Andrej climbing up palm trees, knocking down coconuts, and Andrej and Jeff beating rocks senseless with them (which happened the first night we moved into Seaview).

And then there was the parade. The floats are always so beautiful and entertaining, and they've got great character. It's always sad that you can't get close to them, and that you have to watch them approach and then almost as soon watch them leave and fade into the horizon like so many ghosts being released of their burdens. But that sadness doesn't matter. It's overwhelmed by the moment and the feeling of good times. The floats had names like Melissa and Lillian and Sarah and Alex and Angela and Wolfgang and Thomas and Marine and Mia. As they pass one can't help but wonder if this isn't the best parade one has ever seen; a perfect venue, a perfect time, and, of course, the fact that these aren't floats at all. And this is not a parade. They're people who have become parts of experiences that I will always remember. And this is my life.

We originally met Sarah and Alex and Angela on our first night in Airlie Beach. We first ran into these three Medical Students when we were playing pool in Morocco's and later they also showed up at the Beaches club where that rough night began. But we met them again, purely by chance.

Andrej and I had booked a trip aboard a Reefjet tourist vessel for a day trip out to the beyond words beautiful Whitsunday Islands. We were to go out on a lookout on Hook Island to get some gorgeous panoramic views of Whitehaven Beach (1 of the 3 most beautiful beaches in the world), then actually have a chance to swim on that beach, and finally we'd get some snorkeling in. Definitely a great little day trip to see some of the things you just shouldn't miss if you get a chance to be in that area. The van picked us up at 7:30 in the morning along with Thomas and Wolfgang (two Austrian guys studying in Melbourne who were in that hostel room with us). Wouldn't you know it, but as we're driving around and picking up people for the daycruise, there's those 3 cute medical students from Newcastle, waiting for the van, and isn't that a serendipity doo-dah?

Of course, with or without the inclusion of more people we knew, that trip would've been amazing. But having more people to talk with and get to know better during the stretches of time when we were traveling to the destinations made things a lot of fun.

And then there was the unadvertised highlight of the trip: Divin' Ivan. This guy seriously must have been a pirate in a past life, based on his laugh. He's a tall, middle-aged, gap-toothed man who's loud, boisterous, outgoing, and delightfully irreverent. Which of course makes him funny as fuck. Here's a few soundless soundbites of some of the comical things he was spouting out (that I can remember):

-As we were getting on board, he asked Andrej and I where we were from. Andrej says "Norway." Ivan says "Alright." I say "America." Ivan says "...huh." Then: "So, any of you boys single? I've got two Irish girls in the back there I'm auctioning off. Ok, ok, two for one."

-"The toilet on this boat is one of those space toilets, worst toilets in the world. Hold the button in until everything you've got in there is gone. You'll know it's worked when it gets all over the snorkelers."

-"One of the two emergencies on this boat is something we call 'Man Overboard,' which is when someone gets tossed off the boat. If this happens to be you, try your best to remember to call your name real loudly as you're going over. That way we know which name to cross off the passenger manifest and we'll be on our way. Now, should you be in this situation, one of us will throw you the safety ring. If the safety ring happens to not hit you in the head and knock you unconscious, please, PLEASE grab onto it. It's worth about $500, so be attached to it because we WILL be wanting to get that back."

The trip, of course, was . . . indescribable with words alone. Even with as many pictures as I've written words here, it would be tough to convey the experience of it. After brilliant views of the dozens of Whitsunday Islands we passed by on the way, we stopped at Hook Island to go to that lookout. We were granted some time to take pictures of a view so breathtaking my inhaler barely saved me from it, as well as the opportunity to get a professional picture taken which we wouldn't be buying later. The beach is probably as close to heaven on earth as you can get. Brilliant silica sand formed a champagne white trimming for hills and islands draped with lush green as they floated reverently water that was such a perfect shade of sea green that it brought you to the brink of tears. Marvelous, untouched beauty as far as the eye could see with Whitehaven stretched out for 7Km ahead of us and little Betty's Beach under us and off to the left side.

After that, sort of an adventure began. Apparently the crew hadn't timed things with the tides as well as they'd hoped. Getting us onto the island was a process of loading 60+ people onto a pontoon boat 8 at a time and ferrying them over to the island. They had to pick us up the same way once we had all seen the view. As we waited for them to come and get us, Wolfgang, Andrej, and I waited on the beach and talked with some other travelers, particularly an older woman who'd lived near this part of Australia most of her life. I was surprised to find how rude Andrej was to her as we talked about economics and exports and about Europe. It bothered me, and even more so because I couldn't seem to find a reason for it except that he clearly just did not like her. Perhaps he just doesn't like old people? *shrugs*

Anyway, after they got about 40 people on board the tide became too low for the pontoon boat to come get us. Us poor stranded things had to suffer it out whilst walking on Betty's Beach (which was not originally part of the tour) and getting 'rescued' from there. It was definitely an adventure, as the sea on that side of the island was a lot rougher and we all definitely got soaked on the trip back to the boat. But then they served cake and suddenly we all forgot about how wet we were.

After a short bit of traveling and talking with Sarah, Alex, and Angela, as well as others on the boat, we had a sandwich lunch and then went on Whitehaven Beach. In a word: holy fuck. ... Well, I guess that was two, but it's easy to get things confused because I was in love. The sand was amazing. It didn't get hot even in direct sunlight. I swam in the warm waters of the beach and laid around on my towel afterwards lamenting that I could not do this everyday of my life. I spent the allocated hour or so that way, and then I had to sadly leave it behind and get back on the boat. We had to swim to get back on the boat, though, so that wasn't a total loss.

Next up was snorkeling/diving. We all got into our stinger wetsuits, designed to keep us warm in the water (and to protect us from Jellyfish, although at this time of the year there really aren't any around), and we all promptly felt like superheroes and struck the appropriate poses. Once again: holy fuck. I can see why this is one of the top ten experiences in the world. Schools of fish of all sorts of shapes and sizes and colors swarmed all around us amongst the shallow coral beds of Canaba (sp?) Bay. I saw sea anenomies, stalked a large, rainbow colored fish, and was smacked in the face by Sarah's water noodle (on accident, don't worry). We were allowed about an hour and a half in the water, but by the end of an hour most of us were back on the boat. It was a beautiful view, but an hour of snorkeling after all we'd already done was pretty tiring.

Our adventures with the three young medical students weren't over, though. Wolfgang had managed to convince them to come out to Beaches with us at around 8:30. So we went home, took a shower, once again put off laundry for the sake of a good time - hey, what can you do? - and headed out to drink some beer and get our dance on. Just about everyone from our flat had come along, including Tina (Swedish), Marine (a model-caliber French girl), Jeff, and Jeff's French friend Orillian. It was a wonderful evening and ultimately proved as enjoyable as our trip out to the Whitsundays as we all solidified friendships between each other as well as with Sarah, Alex, and Angela. Laughs were had, drinks were poured, smiles were shared, and continued until well into 4 in the morning.

At about midnight when Beaches was closing, we attempted to move the festivities to another place called The Juice Bar. Alex and Sarah came along with Andrej, Jeff, and I, but everyone else seemed to have disappeared. I had heard that Thomas had told Angela he was in love with her, so that explained why Angela took off and in turn why Thomas did. I'm assuming the others just went to bed. The five of us that were left stayed in The Juice Bar and danced around for a bit, maybe an hour at most, but there really wasn't anyone there.

We took the party to the 3rd bar of the night, Paddy's Shenanegans. This was definitely a crowded bar, and had yet another acoustic-act playing well-known covers. Andrej had gone to the ATM and, in a drunken stupor, accidentally took out $700. So as far as he was concerned, drinks were on him. :) We all had a couple of Jagerbombs (although I ended up finishing the ones we ordered for the girls), which were on top of the at least 5-6 beers we had at Beaches. Plus we had some beer afterward. Perhaps it was just my drunken imagination, and I have absolutely no doubt that it was, but Sarah and I seemed to be dancing a little close and a little closer as the night went on, holding each other by the waist and singing along cheek to the songs everybody knows. This must have been a funny site for everyone else because she's a gorgeous, tall, blonde girl, at least a head taller than I am. I was really enjoying getting to know her, and that's not just the alcohol talking. At first blush, when I first saw her in Morocco's, I figured she was the kind of girl that was destined to be a stranger. Tall, gorgeous, blonde girls aren't exactly standing in line to get to know a short kid like me.

And apparently her and Angela are coming into Melbourne on the 20th and want to hang out with Jeff and I. Jeff was also keen on Sarah . . . but I dare say not in the same way. Jeff is a really cool guy and everything, but he and Andrej are definitely on the same wavelength when it comes to women. Jeff might even be hornier than Andrej (if that's possible). I mean, it's just speculation, but my best guess is that Jeff wants to get in her pants. I was shitass drunk at the time, but sitting around the patio table at about 5am listening to him say things like "I should've kissed Sarah, it would've sealed the deal" gave me a bad vibe. Me and my sentimentalist ways are stupid enough to want a little more than that. I think it's safe to say I like her. But it's also safe to say that I'm in no way attached, which will be good for when she comes down to Melbourne and Jeff manages to hook up with her. I mean, honestly, trying to get her would be like applying to Princeton. You know you're not gonna get in, but it's worth the try anyway because either way, there's no disappointment.

We woke at 9:30am for 10am check out. There was no doubt that I was still drunk. I stood in the shower, swaying back and forth, getting dizzy from watching the water twist down into the drain. Afterward, we went to the lagoon to swim and tan where We bumped into fellow Americans Melissa and Lillian. We had bumped into them that first night that we were here, and also the following day when we spent a full 8 or 9 hours on said lagoon beach. Andrej originally met them in Cairns, as they were staying at the same hostel as us. We just seemed to keep bumping into them, which was fine with me. They're cool girls, easy going, lots of fun to talk to. We're hoping to actually plan to bump into them as we tour around Brisbane and Gold Coast, which would be cool, because then we'd have seen them in every stage of our vacation.

After we left I remember Andrej saying "Man, I love those American girls." I pointed out to him he had also previously said: "Man, I love those medical girls," and "Man, there's gonna be this hot French girl when we get to Cairns." (He was speaking of Marine.) And I pointed out how just the night before he had almost gone home with another American girl and couldn't stop bitching about how he didn't. I guess I was calling him a player in not so many words. We had a laugh about it. I think I died a little inside, but we laughed just the same.

Our time here in Airlie Beach is coming to a close. I'm sitting on the beach writing this as it comes closer and closer to our 5:00 PM plane to Brisbane. It'll be nice getting into a city after a week in small tourist towns. I'll be sure to get to you tomorrow and let you know how our first night in Brisbane went.

Aussie Doozy of the Day:
Pizza is so fucking cheap here and is also done very different. First of all, the average price for a large pizza is $7. That's Australian dollars, remember. Which makes it like . . . $5.50 for us. Also, their standards aren't plain cheese, pepperoni, and 2-topping specials. The 'specialty' pizza menu in American pizza shops is the standard menu in Australian pizza shops, even in American chains like Dominos. All those pizzas are like, $7. I think I'm in love.